Yesterday, dutiful Son LanceAround called his mom, Grammy LanceAround. She said she was watching TV where the Phillies’ had a spring training game against the Blue Jays. She was feeling a little lonely.
Grammy’s been feeling lonely ever since Grandpa LanceAround passed away a little over four years ago. I try to think of a way to make her feel happier.
I go www.AllegiantAir.com and find a cheap airline ticket so Grammy can fly from Allentown, PA to Orlando, FL the next morning, then watch the Phillies play the Braves at Disney’s Wide World of Sports–the stadium is so close to our home you can almost see it from our front door.
But Grammy LanceAround can’t go. So Mrs. LanceAround decides we will go to the game and find a way to say hi to Grammy.
Because we were more interested in saying hi to Grammy than watching the Phillies, we get to the stadium over a half hour after the start of the game. Still, it takes over 20 minutes to park as it is bumper to bumper getting into the parking lot. We take the parking shuttle from our car to the front of the stadium and see a booth labeled “Tickets For Media.” I ask the person manning the booth if he could give us two free media passes. He says no, but he happens to have two tickets because someone did not want them. He gives them to us and refuses to take any money.
(Does this kind of thing only happen to the LanceAround family or is it a common occurence?)
Mrs. LanceAround is feeling a little peeked, so we go into the ESPN Wide World of Sports Grill across from the entrance to the stadium and get a slice of pizza and some coffee for $10. While there, we watch the game on the monitor and call Grammy. It’s the fourth inning. She’s watching the game on her TV at home just outside of Philadelphia and we confirm exactly where the camera is pointing when the batter is up.
Mrs. LanceAround and I finish lunch and walk into the stadium, sneak past the ticket checker at the top of the home plate stairway and walk down to an empty seat just behind the batter. We hold up the signs I had printed before leaving home and call Grammy.
“Can you see us?”
“Yes, but what is the sign Mrs. LanceAround is holding that says, ‘1-H’?
“1-H? Hold…on a minute…” (whispering to Mrs. Lance Around) “…You’re holding your sign upside down!”
Mrs. LanceAround turns her sign around and Grammy proclaims, “Oh, I see it now, it says ‘HI MOM!'”
In the meantime, just a few feet in front of us Ryan Howard hits a two run home run for the Phillies. (Really, does this kind of thing only happen to the LanceAround family?) There’s a Philly fan sitting behind us in the second row, listening to our conversation. She wants to know if Grammy can really see us on TV. So I hand her the phone.
“Hi Grammy, can you really see your Son on TV???…You can!…Wo-Hoo, can you see me too???…YOU CAN!!!…GO PHILLIES…WO-HOO!”
By now, everyone around us is laughing and cheering for Grammy LanceAround.
Our mission accomplished, Mrs. LanceAround and I head out of the stadium as they’re singing “Take Me Out To The Ball Game” during the seventh inning stretch. This really is a wonderful venue in which to enjoy a ball game.
And tonight, maybe, Grammy LanceAround will feel just a little less lonely.
We love you, mom!
LanceAround & Mrs. LanceAround
PS: Here’s a link to the video of Ryan Howard’s home run. You can just see Mrs. LanceAround standing on the stairs right behind Ryan: Mrs. LanceAround & Ryan Howard’s Home Run